THE CHANGING LOVE SCENE

The love scene has changed drastically since our old days. I long for those days that a hand written letter loaded with love song lyrics from hit love songs could just do the magic. Interestingly, this is the only phase during my entire lifetime that I listened to Westlife, Celine Dion and the like. Remember Solidad, Queen of My Heart and other shitty love songs back then? In those hay days, all I needed to express my love was my impressive handwriting and some sweet words albeit largely borrowed from Westlife songs’ lyrics. Chilling in the house worked or in the extreme cases, taking a walk within the neck of the hood. Simple. Easy.

Fast forward. 2015. Expressing your love nowadays has become a complex idea. Her inkling of love is going to Impala grounds, sit on the grass (or a Maasai Shuka) taking some expensive vodka while listening to some music that she doesn’t have idea which genre it belongs. Others, want to attend Masaku 7s and all other rugby 7s circuit encounters notwithstanding her ignorance of what ‘a try’ means. If you don’t grant these wishes and others just as ridiculous, you will be deemed not be so loving. From the foregoing, a subtle deduction is that love has developed a close relationship with money. Tragic.

As tragic as it is that money has taken precedence over love, guys are learning to adapt. However, if you don’t live up to her perception of expressing love then you can as well kiss the relationship goodbye because believe or not, there is another man standing by and ready to give her the world. Ha! And against the man with money bags, you will surely lose unless it is an exceptional true love.  The bottom line is that money shouldn’t be a criteria for love but I can as well tell that to the birds in the air. 

THE TRAGEDY OF KENYANS’ INDIFFERENCE

In Summary

Kenyans’ indifference to issues is a cause for concern. In this piece, I argue that Kenyan’s bystander approach and has contributed significantly to poor governance in the country.  There is need for each one of us to at least stand for something as things don’t fix themselves. Read on....

A couple of weeks ago I was chatting with a friend of mine just in the wake of the tragic Garissa attack. While discussing the state of affairs in the country, I ask her, just out of curiosity, if she voted during the last general election. “No, I didn’t. Politicians don’t help me in any way,” she (naively) responds.  Fair enough.  “So how did that help fix poor governance currently being witnessed in the country?” I probe further. Unfortunately, this time she has no response for me.

You see the tragedy with majority of Kenyans is the tendency to be indifferent towards issues; be it political, economic or social.  For them, they feel it is not their responsibility. To this end, we are experiencing runaway corruption because people don’t simply care yet it is their money (in form of taxes) that has been stolen.  The furthest they can go is to protest through hashtags in the social media but more often than not, it requires so much more than hashtags to effect change in poor governance. Currently, the price of Unga has gone up from Ksh.75 to Ksh.105 with some brands retailing at Ksh.120. While this has significantly increased the cost of living, good Kenyans are keeping their peace yet it has poked a hole in their pockets.

In the work environment, characters like my friend referred above who like taking the middle ground rarely prosper. Apart from being an easy and safe option, they want to appear modest in the eyes of others. During staff meetings, these chaps will not say anything but they have notepads and will be writing down other people’s ideas or views instead of sharing they own. They will keep their peace and observe others haggle over issues. However, what they fail to realize is that by playing safe nobody will ever notice their presence even if they their IQ is 150.  When promotions come around, the manager will easily ignore them simply because they are passive and lack assertiveness. Rightly so.; they don’t stand for anything; nada. Zero. Nobody will know about your brilliance if you don’t participate in issues. Corporate world is vicious and with this kind of attitude, you will probably be stack in your position for a very long time.

In conclusion, the bottom line is that we should cease the bystander approach to critical issues that affect the society at large because it’s for the greater good. You either support the government, the opposition or the civil society but don’t be a casual observer sitting on the fringes.  Things don’t fix themselves. At least stand for something. 

ITS 2017 AND BABA IT IS!

Its 2017, I am sitting in the living room with my son, Harvey, watching the inauguration ceremony of Kenya’s fifth President. There is a lot of noise by the joyous crowd gathered at Uhuru Park grounds.  Meanwhile, my lovely wife, Nyambura, who hails from Kiharu has decided not to watch the ceremony with us.

She is (pretending to be) busy with some (far-fetched) house chores. I understand how she feels. I was in the same position exactly 5 years ago. I let her be. She has been moody since the election results were announced. She loves me to bits though (or so I believe). Ha!  

The Chief Justice now tries in vain to calm down the now super charged crowd running to a million chanting “Baba! Baba! Baba!” He signals them to come down. There is momentary silence with a few chants here and there. Then he breaks the silence…

I, Raila Amollo Odinga, solemnly affirm that I will truly and diligently serve the people and the Republic of Kenya in the office of the President; that I will diligently discharge my duties and perform my functions in the Office of President of the Republic of Kenya; and I will do justice to all in accordance with this constitution, as by law established, and the laws of Kenya, without fear, favour, affection or ill-will. So help me God.

The crowd breaks into wild cheers and jubilation. The KTN cameraman zooms in the crowd. I see a section of the crowd overwhelmed by emotions; they are crying. Tears of joy. It’s unbelievable baba is now officially the fifth President of Republic of Kenya.

A tear drops from my right eye. Oh my God I’m crying too jeez! I bet you don’t want to know when I last cried. “Daddy, why are you crying,” Harvey asks me. I wipe my tears and look at him with my eyes now reddish. “That man you see over there is the greatest leader our country has ever had. His victory has been stolen twice in the past and this was his last chance to be Kenya’s President and he has finally made it. I’m very happy Harvey,” I tell Harvey.

At this point it doesn’t matter to me whether Harvey thinks that his dad is weak. It is a defining moment. Meanwhile, the crowd is unstoppable. They are singing, dancing and waving placards suggesting towards the dais.  Security is having a really difficult time. Baba unsuccessfully tries to calm the mammoth crowd now ultra-charged.  He decides to address them amidst the noise but he can’t continue as the noise is too much. He boards the presidential limo and his entourage follows him. The huge crowd follows the entourage. It crazy.

Once again Kenya is voted the most optimistic country in the world. In the meantime, I go to the kitchen where I find mama Harvey washing the utensils. I pause slightly, admiring the magical beauty in front of me (damn! She is fine. The little voice is my head whispers) then I break eerie silence…

“Si you will slaughter that jogoo for dinner. “Sawa babe”, she responds (in a sweet charming voice) without looking at me. Of course the chicken must die as we celebrate baba’s historic victory. Others will bring down bulls and goats. I am not sure about sheep. The chicken that I had set aside for celebrations in 2013 was spared as we controversially lost (we were rigged out).

I go back to the living room. All media stations are busy analyzing baba’s impending presidency. NTV is hosting Mutahi Nguyi (I want to smack his face, shit!) while KTN hosts Adams Oloo, Political Science don from the University of Nairobi. I call my friends supporting jubilee to tease them. I tell them this thing #IsMarwa and #Okwabisecho he he he…Some are deeply hurt but I tell them to give baba a chance, he will deliver.

I then call my folks and share the joy. We chat and laugh. In deed it’s a new beginning for Kenya as Kenya’s father democracy takes charge. It was a long time coming. Awooh! 

SO MUCH FOR WHATSAPP GROUP CHAT NOTIFICATIONS, I QUIT

“I fear the day technology will replace physical human interaction”- Albert Einstein. As it has happened, the scientist prophecy came to pass as technology has actually replaced physical human interaction today and what better way than other than social media. Whatsapp, (world’s leading messaging service) just like other social media applications has revolutionized the way we interact with one another especially in this era that people don’t have time to visit family and friends owing to tight schedules (or so we say).

Granted, this has prompted people to create cyber interaction space to compensate for their inability to visit in person and have a one on one conversation. Whatsapp Group Chat has proved to be the perfect avenue for chat among friends who want to constantly keep in touch without necessarily physically meeting.

While Whatsapp Group chats has enabled us to keep in touch with our dear ones, it has also been a source of great nuisance for many. A nuisance caused by the numerous whatsapp notifications that you get every morning you go live and the worst part is that the chat has nothing that concerns you or serves your interest.

Not long ago, I used to be in about six or so Whatsapp chat. Don’t get me started on the number of unnecessary notifications that I used to get. I wake up, turn on my phone’s data and voila! 1023 notifications. How lucky? You can imagine because there are those who haven’t received any message for a very long time.

But believe me you, the 1023 messages and other hundreds that I used to receive from time to time had nothing to do with me; with majority being motivational messages which I happen to loathe so much. Even if I had the whole time in the world, I couldn't have read all the messages.

It came a time that I had to make a judgement call; a bold decision but unpopular as it would rub friends and family the wrong way. Nonetheless, it had to be made as I could not stand the notifications running to thousands. I exited all the groups except for a few that were very critical. Yes, I did.

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Here is a piece of advice, if you want your Whatsapp Group chat to stand test of time and keep all its members intact. First, have a clear common goal for the group, for example, if it’s a chat for the investment chama make sure only information relevant to the group is posted there. That way, you will avoid hundreds of notifications as a result of numerous redundant motivational messages or stupid memes.

Secondly, you can throw a few light moments here and there but don’t overdo it. If you feel that you want to motivate or crack jokes, do it moderately, once in a while. Imagine having all 100 of you posting stupid memes. Eventually one will walk out of the group as your bogus meme and motivational message will be the straw that broke the camel’s back. 

Maybe I was wired differently or age is finally catching up with me, regardless of the reason chatting is nowadays becoming a heavy task for me.

P.S ‪#‎MyWhatsappMyChoice but I still value you. It’s nothing personal just a difference in tastes and preferences

FAMILY ENTERTAINMENT IS NO MORE

How many times have you experienced awkward moments while watching a movie or series with friends or family? One too many times, right? The prohibiting of the controversial movie ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ by the government film regulator brings to fore the increasing challenge of family entertainment.

To bring you up to speed, Fifty Shades of Grey was banned (obviously) due to the pornographic content and other latent immoral lessons. You will agree with me that it’s becoming increasingly difficult to find a movie or TV series that you can comfortably watch and with your family or in presence of the young ones. When it happens that you are watching with others, the sex scene seems to last like forever and it can’t get any more awkward (eew!). You wish the power could go off but no, it is there to stay (tell me about it).

Nowadays, you will hardly find a movie or TV series that does not have (an explicit) sex scene. As a matter of fact, the sex scenes have proliferated and there is barely a difference between a typical movie and a pornography. Some are just extreme that even if you are watching alone it becomes very uncomfortable (I know what you are thinking he he he). You have to turn down the volume so that the neighbors don’t get a wrong impression because you were innocently watching what was supposed to be a normal movie.

TV shows like Banshee, The Affair, Spartacus, and Games of Throne among others come to mind. Also, lately the movie/TV series producers have introduced gay sex scenes (Scandal, for example) in a bid to normalize homosexuality which is yet to be accepted in the African culture further aggravating the already dire situation. 

Fifty Shades of Grey and others like it are poisoning the minds of our children and even young adults.  Children exposed to pornography are the ones that end up committing rape when they become of age. Adults on the other hand have sexual dysfunctions which ultimately lead to broken marriages. Unfortunately, what they fail to realize is that the guys on the movie are merely acting and some of the things they do are not entirely true for instance the overrated orgasms, pleasure (ha!).

It will be a daunting task to get a morally upright (read moderate) entertainment for the family in the future with the increasing sexualizing of entertainment. For the producers, sex sells and that’s good enough for them. All said and done, its trickles down to personal responsibility.

P.S Yoh! Now, get your mind out of the ditch huh!

KENYAN GOSPEL MUSIC THAT IS NOT SO GOSPEL

I don’t consider myself to be (very) religious but I try depending on your standards. So, I know one or two things about the glory of God. While keeping up to date with current affairs (idling) on Facebook a couple of days ago, I stumbled upon the tiff between Bahati and Willy Paul. I guess you have too. The two are supposedly the biggest gospel artists in Kenya (debatable). Their case brings to fore the complete ignorance of copyright laws among Kenyan music fraternity but that’s a topic for another day.

Personally, I don’t consider the duo to be gospel artists because I don’t find anything inspiring to bring any lost sheep closer to God.  Things went from bad to worse when they started comparing God to women and other nonsensical comparatives all befitting the definition of  blasphemy. In fact, if you replace God with your guy or girl in their lyrics you get yourself a perfect love song. Ha!

You can’t compare their songs with the likes of Sarah K or Christina Shusho locally (I don’t know about Rose Muhando, I think she makes a lot of noise in her music) or Don Moen on international standards. Whereas I am a passive fan of gospel music, in general, I must say that the standards of ‘true’ gospel music in Kenya has been watered down with gospel artists trying to appeal to both secular fans and gospel fans. What we have now is gospel artists masking elements of secular music in their gospel songs. They can’t have it both ways; you are either a gospel artist or a secular artist whichever the case is fine but there is no in between like Kalonzo.

On another perspective, I think gospel artists are under immense pressure to be in their best behaviours especially in the eyes of the public. They would like to indulge in the earthly pleasures of the secular world but they fear they will be judged harshly. They feel caged and suffocated by societal expectations placed upon them. They therefore decide to pretend and we all know there is nothing worse than being a pretender.

That aside, in my view I think Willy Paul really wants to be a secular music artist and the ‘gospel’ artist tag is somewhat (really) holding him back. We haven’t seen the best of him yet. He wants to sing ‘bongo’ just like Diamond Platinumz Msafi and be successful just as much.  On the whole, I think Willy Paul is better than Bahati (don’t bite my nose) even if he steals other people’s songs and being way over his head. His delivery is slightly better as compared to mama singer.  I dare say he should cross over to the secular music and fully unleash his full potential as gospel music is not for him.